How sex makes you young

Wrinkle killer, happiness maker, fountain of youth – it is even said to alleviate pain. According to studies, sex is a multi-talent. We talked to the renowned couple and sex therapist Dr. Beatrice Wagner about her practical experience.

You have written books about lust and love together with the brain researcher Ernst Pöppel and the “enlightener of the nation” Oswalt Kolle. Can you also confirm from your work as a sex therapist that sex is a fountain of youth?

Absolutely! Beautifully fulfilling sex is not only fun, it also keeps you young. We probably suspect this when we feel so wonderfully relaxed and at peace with ourselves after sex. Some time ago, a psychologist from Edinburgh wanted to know more precisely. He started a call to find particularly young-looking people. The 3,500 people who wrote to him actually looked between five and seven years younger than they really were. Their common feature: they were all very satisfied with their sexual lives in recent years. Those aged 40 to 50 benefited most from the fountain of youth that is sexuality, if they had sex at least three times a week.

So how do you do “it” right? Three times a week strengthens the immune system, twice lowers the risk of heart attack?

If we ask the statistics, this could be about right. However, in individual cases it depends on the duration and intensity of the sexual act. A quickie has less anti-aging effects than long extensive act with several climaxes. And, of course, a loveless in-out game does not bring anything at all. You should already be there with all your heart.

Is sex the same fountain of youth for men and women?

But of course, first of all, both sexes benefit. However, with men, the pressure to perform in bed is often in the foreground, which has a counterproductive effect. And with women, I observe that they often just let sex happen to them, which also has little effect. To benefit from the fountain of youth that is sex, both men and women need to devote themselves to the moment. And that the problems, the worries, the complexes are banished from the bedroom.

What do you recommend to couples in this regard in your practice?

Make time for sex. If you have children and / or are working, this often only works if you consciously schedule the hours for two. And if, in the case of women, the desire is not there from the start, then yes, the thought of rejuvenation could help them. I mean that in all seriousness, by the way. Women have many different entry points into their personal lust.

So what do the silver singles do who don’t have a (sex) partner but still like to feel young and sexy?

I can only recommend: Self is the woman or the man! And regularly, thinking, “I do something good for myself “. Masturbation does not work quite as well as an anti-aging agent as communal sex, because here the cuddle hormone oxytocin falls by the wayside, but it is still clearly better than abstinence.

What physical characteristics are strengthened by a fulfilling sex life?

During sex and orgasm, a colorful cocktail of hormones is produced that affects many areas. The hormones oxytocin and prolactin are responsible for youthfulness; both have a calming and de-stressing effect that is long-lasting. Elastic skin is promoted by the growth factors called HGH, which are also increasingly released. The “feel-good hormones”, are natural pain killers and anxiety relievers. Vasopressin, a hormone of sexual arousal, has a preventive effect for heart attacks and arteriosclerosis. In addition, physical exertion is good for the heart and circulation and provides, for example, fresh, slightly reddened skin. And then the immune system is also boosted.

Is there an age limit for good and therefore healthy sex?

Get rid of the notion that there is an expiration date for falling in love, love and sex. It’s all nonsense! The desire and the orgasm are produced in the head and that works until old age. Only the signs of arousal, such as becoming wet and erection, occur more slowly over the years and no longer to the full extent. But here there are aids. A lubricating cream for the woman, a tourniquet for the man. The tourniquet is attached to the base of the penis, it allows the blood to pool in the penis. A small crumb of Viagra & co also works wonders, the whole pill is often not needed. Enjoy the opportunity to touch each other, give and receive caresses, have sex, and don’t think about what other people might say about it. It is your life.

What example from your practice did you find particularly encouraging?

For example, the 67-year-old man who has come to me a few times now, each time beaming to me about new sensual experiences with his girlfriend. Until now, he was trapped in conventions like “Can I do that? Is that what you do? What would others say?” He has freed himself from these shackles in therapy sessions and now the two of them do what they themselves think is right. It is a joy for me to see him so youthful and authentic. Just like the 72-year-old woman who has been freshly in love for six months. She asked me in amazement how it could be that she enjoys sexuality so much. That she was only now having great orgasms – and she blushed a bit like a teenager. I could have hugged her.

Dr. Beatrice Wagner is an experienced couple and sex therapist. She practices in Munich and in Icking. She is also a lecturer in medical psychology at the Ludwig Maximilian University in Munich and a book author. Together with Oswalt Kolle she wrote, among others, the work “Sex – The Ten Deadly Sins”. With the brain researcher Ernst Pöppel she wrote the bestseller “The older, the better”. She also published: “No good sex without unwillingness”. Dr. Wagner is a regular guest on talk shows and writes for various magazines.

Photo: Dr. Beatrice Wagner
Cover photo: Volodymyr Tverdokhlib/